The Moose In-laws are coming!

It is the middle of the week and I am trying to type up my column for the weekend, but I am a might bit distracted because my moose-in-laws are coming! You understand – there’s dad’s inspection of the wood stove, the cobwebs in the corner need to be cleared away and those leaves had better stay on the trees for a few more days despite the rain.

Anyway, when I am distracted, I always start with a Google search, just for a little something to get me going and look what I found this morning when I searched for moose…

"MOOSE, originally an acronym for Man Out Of Space Easiest and later changed to the more professional-sounding Manned Orbital Operations Safety Equipment, was a proposed emergency "bail-out" system capable of bringing a single astronaut safely down from Earth's orbit to the planet's surface." Here is the link so you can read all about it, straight from the source at Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MOOSE.

Now that will give you something to bring up in a random conversation with the moose-in-laws. Or maybe we could study the photos and build our own – you know, just a little project.

Hey Corey, maybe you could help me with this new product idea and offer a supply kit at the Mooseville store.

I could help you write the ad: “Everything you need to build you own MOOSE contraption for only $9.99” In the fine print we could add – It will be guaranteed to protect you from black flies and mosquitoes for at least 12 seconds or as long as your remain in the plastic bag and one size will fit most idiots.

Well, I guess I had better go for this week – but hey keep you eyes peeled on the website for this new MOOSE product, it might go straight to clearance!

Check out the new stuff at Mooseville -- www.mooseville.com.

Continuing the Moose Road Trip

Hi Everyone! Brodey here, coming to you from Baltimore, Maryland.

I know, I have been one busy moose lately, but the work of the mayor of Mooseville is just never finished. I am here in Baltimore to attend the wedding of Robin and Mike – and boy was it one heck of a trip to get here. It all started with a walk down to Farmington and then my new friend gave me a ride down the coast.

Well, if you think a moose can stop traffic along Route 4, you should
see the back up I caused near the George Washington Bridge last night.

But I would have to say, I did sleep like a baby last night -
snuggled up under a down comforter in my hotel room.

For seafood lovers, Baltimore provides the opportunity to feast on
crab cakes, crab chowder and just in case you can’t get enough there
are giant platters filled with only crab and French fries. Every
restaurant seems to say that it has the best, but it seems impossible
to judge, so as a crazy moose – I opted for Mexican food instead.
So I am off to the wedding, a moose in tux with a tails and a top hat
– I only wish there were pictures to share!

Tune in next week for a little excitement we had in Mooseville while I was traveling...hint...it has to do with squirrels and such!

Live from Cape Cod!

This is Mayor Brodey Moose blogging to you live from Cape Cod, Massachusetts.

It is an amazing thing, every week or so, I get to tell you all about
the wonders of Mooseville and my crazy life as the mayor, but this
week I thought you might like to come along for a little Moose road
trip. I am spending the weekend soaking up the ocean breezes and even putting
a hoof in the cold waters of the Atlantic.

I did, however, get some strange looks - you know the ones - what is
that moose doing on the beach? But I just smile and wave and the
lookers seem to wander off eventually. They often, though, want to come up and take their picture with me! I guess it is not every day that they get to see a moose on the beach!

I also did a little fishing, but for future reference, it does help if
you put a hook on the end of your line. But as a vegetable-loving
moose, I find that it is just as much fun to dangle the string in the
water and dream away the afternoon. Besides, I do look extra
handsome sporting a fishing vest.

I have to head back to Mooseville on Monday because I got to start
planning for the annual Scarecrow Reunion held in Phillips, Maine
which will be held in early October. I think this year, I might try
to... Oh, I guess I better keep my idea a secret for now.

And next week, I will be heading south to Baltimore, Maryland and the
wedding of Robin Beck and Michael Maher.

I will try to get some pictures. You know I can be a little camera shy sometimes!

Happy Summer and Moosecellaneous!

Hello Summer!

This week we welcomed back the sunshine to Mooseville!   It was a strange phenomenon – blue sky and  warm temperatures, but it sure had everyone in good spirits, including me. Everything seems to be drying out and despite my optimism, I would have to admit that I am getting ready for the next batch of thunderstorms and clouds.  The nice folks at the Farmer’s Almanac even went so far as to apologize last week for being right – but being right isn’t always a good thing.

In other news around the Moose state, the legislature decided to prohibit smoking in state parks, beaches and historic sites.  The law, put forth earlier this year by Senator John Nutting,  was passed just before most parks opened for the summer season.

As the mayor of Mooseville, I try not to be too political, but I am pleased with this new effort to reduce secondhand smoke for the animals and people who enjoy the parks and it will eliminate those ugly cigarette butts from littering our favorite places.

Now if I can just convince people to stop throwing trash out of their cars – there was already is a law against littering, so stop already will you! We don’t even have any fast food restaurants in Mooseville, but I am always stumbling over Burger King and McDonalds bags and wrappers.  I do fancy those new Frostys from Wendy’s, but there never seems to be anything left in the cups except rain water and that is a real disappointment for me.

I also wanted to talk up the new section of Mooseville for a little bit. It's called Moosecellaneous! It is going to be growing into something for you to be entertained and have a good laugh when you visit! So if you are having a bad day, this will definitely be a place to go to help lift your spirits! It will have things that are not moose from fun signs, t-shirts, lights, oddball items and plush animals. Keep checking it out weekly for fun new products! Here's a link to it now!

Don't forget your sunscreen and have a great week ahead!

Catch Up!

You have probably been wondering what happened to me these last few months… the new grass, the flowers and spring fever had me in the mood for traveling!

I know we live in a high tech world, where I could tweet my every move, but I decided that you don’t really need to know what I am thinking about in between mouthfuls and the answer to the Facebook question of what’s on your mind would likely be too scary.

I will humor you with a recap of my spring adventures. It might just keep you curious humans on the edge of your seats. In the heat of the April summer, I went to Massachusetts to welcome little Julianna – she will be a heart breaker in a few years. To get away from the mud and black flies, I dropped by to see Corey in New Jersey and took a little vacation at the Star Barn Bed and Breakfast. I do love Toothaker Pond for a relaxing swim.

Lately, I have been busy slowing the traffic at my favorite spots along Routes 4 and 16. June proved to be a cool and rainy month, good for growing bugs but somewhat challenging for tomatoes, so I have been checking the progress of the new asparagus.

Did you know they are building a new road up to Rangeley and they are straightening out the S – curves along the way? It is supposed to be done later this year, but we shall see…wasn’t it supposed to be done last year? If you are inclined to drive up to Rangeley, be sure you make a pit stop at the Bear Hill Variety store before you head north because it might take you the best part of an hour to get there from Madrid.

But as my mom always said, the road to a friends is never long…I look forward to your visit soon!

Hello there Spring!

Hello there Spring!

Spring has sprung around western Maine – grass is visible, albeit brown, driveways are muddy and the snow sure is melting after a handful of warm days.
I did visit my smart friends down at the University of Maine – Farmington and saw a row of brave tulips poking up near the library, can’t wait for those colors. It seems too soon for those, but who am I to say!
As the mayor of Mooseville, I haven’t had much to say politically of late, but I think we should all take advantage of the Spring to celebrate the “Day the Moose Sprung” day!
A day where you might sit on your back porch and relish in the sunshine and laugh at the cluster flies who are confused by the warm temperatures and the big snow bank that you created with all that shoveling over the railing. Or maybe, you might head down to Farmington and sit on the bench outside Java Joes and just wave at the cars driving by…it is fun for me! Or just maybe, you could live dangerously and wash that old beater of a car you drive – as long as the dirt isn’t holding it all together!
I hope you have a great week filled with sunshine! Ahhh…the joy of spring – I can lick the salt off the roadways and wander through the melting bogs…wait, I think I feel a haiku coming.

Spring moose temptations
Laugh at the camera-laden cars
Wander across the road

Love is in the Air!

What a busy week it has been in Mooseville.

First we start with the bad news…Phil from Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania predicted six more weeks of winter! But that wasn’t really that unexpected for moose around town who had predicted a blustery February and a snowy March, but then we can talk about the hints of April’s peak at spring. For Arizona Cardinal Fans, they lost the big game.

But now moving onto the good news, it was a great game! A couple of random guys made a fun commercial for Doritos and got a million dollars for throwing a snow globe into a vending machine full of chips.

Valentine’s Day is coming right up, so to get you in the mood for love, I thought I would include this recipe from The Best of Strong Cooking (Strong, Maine).

Recipe for Love
By Anne Baker

1 c. love
1 boy
1 girl
2 c. kisses
4 c. hugs
1 T. aggressiveness
7 c. “?!&%#$”

Set all on a park bench and stir well. Put among the trees and bushes with one faded lamplight, a full moon and a deserted area. Then add a pinch of luck from the matchmaker.

Now, like Christmas, I hate to have to remind you, but moose like women have expectations. These expectations revolve around chocolate, flowers and the sappiest card that you can bear to sign your name on the inside, plus a gift. So get busy, because it is on Saturday and Corey still needs time to get your gifts in the mail.

Don’t forget your first loves – your mom and dad, your goofy college boyfriend and your husband! Check out the special Valentine's Section at Mooseville!

Love is in air – isn’t life just full of moose-e-ness!

Happy Holidays!

Well, the holidays are just around the corner and if you have not finished your shopping, I hate to sound pessimistic, but you are seriously running out of time.

Mooseville as you know is located in the western mountains of Maine and as a result, I always think that locating the perfect Christmas tree should not be hard. I spend the better part of most days wandering around the woods, so theoretically I have had all year to look at my options.

Well, last weekend, I went for a walk to find the Christmas tree. The snow was crusty enough after the ice storm to be annoying, but not too deep. I started up a little hill and came to a pleasant little frozen bog, but the perfect tree still eluded me.

You know what I mean. Not too short, not too tall…and for humans they have to worry about too wide to fit though the front door, but you cannot get one that is too skinny either! A skinny tree is like a skinny moose – just wrong.

A few snowflakes and a long walk, make the perfect tree easier to find after a while. Your perfect tree is somehow redefined as you start fantasizing about a cup of hot chocolate.

And almost before I realized it – there it was standing before me. Well, as a moose I do not have much use for cutting it down and hauling it down the side of the mountain, but I like to take a few minutes with my tree and take stock of the last year.

It was an adventure and my year was full of fun and I met some interesting folks along the way – so to each of you, I want to say Happy Holidays and wish you the best for 2009!

I know, I am usually not so philosophical, but it happens, now and again when you give a moose like me a blog.

Time flies like the snow!

Happy December!

While I know the big thing on everyone’s mind is the round happy guy with the overgrown goatee these days, I wanted to tell you about one of the legendary residents of Mooseville.

As the mayor, I meet all kinds of interesting moose in my travels. I wanted to send a hello out to my good friend Roger. He has been keeping an eye on all the winter preparations going on at Saddleback Maine. The mountain is due to open any day now and Roger said the snow is really piling up.

Roger has started training for the Lollipop races. It takes a lot of practice to coordinate all four moose legs on skis to go in the same direction, but to be fair how many moose do you know that can ski?

Be sure to wave to Roger – he has been hanging out near the Access Road keeping the trees trimmed!

There is still no words from President elect – Obama on the appointment of the Secretary of the Moose. When I was checking on the latest moose news, I did find these two important moose facts from the folks at the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources. ”A moose can store more than 100 pounds of food in its stomach. Moose can run 35 mph and easily swim 10 miles without stopping.”

I didn’t, however, find anything about Roger’s downhill ski record online, but maybe it is top-secret because of his status as a potential Secretary of the Moose candidate! I will keep you posted!

It's FINALLY over!

Greetings!

The big election for humans is finally over - now what will the folks have to talk about? As the Mayor of Mooseville, I thought I would offer a list of suggested conversation starters for those of you struggling at the water cooler or at the next Hunter's Breakfast.

I do like making lists - now if only I could find the one I wrote about what I should be doing today, I would be all set. Excuse me if I repeat myself, but I sure am glad these antlers of mine are attached!

Conversation starters for the residents of Mooseville:

When do you think the president elect will start running for re-election?
Will the new president appoint a Secretary of Moose?
When will the country be ready for a Moose President?

Now if you are dealing with some highly intelligent "Moosey" types, these questions are likely to be better still to get folks riled up.

Can you use powdered ice tea mix to make hot tea?
Are Cluster flies really as dumb as they appear? I mean really, they just buzz around the lights and spin on the floor, but what is going on in their heads.

If hunters expect to be successful, why do they eat so much at the Hunter's Breakfast?
I would think all those sausage links would weigh them down and cause them to just need a nap - wait, I think I may have stumbled upon the answer here. A nice nap in the cab of their truck at the far end of a skidder road without the wife around to complain they haven't done anything around the house. Pure genius! I knew they wore those orange clothes for a reason - to highlight their intelligence.

Back to my questions...I guess I am obligated to mention the old standby...so, how about this weather we're having. I realize that the truth is, if you don't like the weather, you can always wait five minutes and it will be doing something different.

If you get bored and need something to look at, don't forget all your favorite things at Mooseville!

Wood Piles

Greetings!

October has come to a close and most of the trees around Mooseville have shed their leaves. The weather sure has been unseasonable the last few weeks, but winter will be coming on quick now that we have turned the calendar to November.

Most folks are still scrambling to button up their houses before the cold wind starts blowing. This week I saw a scary site – a crazy bearded guy poised rather precariously on ladder yielding a caulking gun. I am not sure what possessed him to think that thirty feet up in the air was the place to wave his arms around and try to learn how to fly, but it did make for amusing entertainment while I was eating his Brussels sprouts. But I won’t reveal his name – wouldn’t want the neighbors to talk.

I did see him with his feet firmly planted on the ground yesterday, but he wasn’t moving too fast. I think he may have caulked his shoes together by mistake.

Speaking of my neighbors, I can’t even see their house because of the huge stack of wood they have piled out front – maybe they are using it as rustic decoration. I know they do not have the same sense of moose fashion that I do, but really, they could try a little harder. At least, they could visit the Mooseville website for some moose accessories.

I am starting feel a little distracted and a bit itchy these days, as my winter coat starts to grow. I did hear from my cousin Marvin who lives by Mooselukemeguntic Lake that it has already snowed up his way. He waits all summer for that first snow, but then he is the first to complain that he’s mooserable!

Popcorn Falls

Greetings!

The leaves have proven to be spectacular this year and the weather – a moose couldn’t ask for better. Warm and breezy days and cool autumn nights with just a hint of frost, but winter may play a cruel joke on all of us this year and promises to be a frigidly cold one.

Despite the good weather, I spent the better part of last week looking high and low for my red plaid vest. It isn’t like me to loose things, you know my antlers are attached! I was thinking that someone might have tried to auction it off on Ebay, but I do take an irregular size. As you can see with the above picture, I still do not have my vest but I do have my Scout Popcorn!

I can’t imagine how something moosey could be so elusive? I probably got distracted by a snack and left it dangling on a tree limb somewhere. I guess I had better order up something new from Corey – he has all these new sweatshirts and pjs. He is pretty quick to send them out, and they are sure to arrive just in time to keep me warm and snuggly as I curl up by the woodstove. Check out the website www.mooseville.com!

My buddy Fred had a run in with a car last week, but he is one tough turkey...I mean moose! He’s hobbling around and making do with snacks from the ladies who lunch at the historical society. I would hate to see the car!

Did you know – October is National Popcorn Popping Month. Me either, but thanks to my faithful readers for reminding me about that one after my National Moose Day rant last week. I look forward to hearing from you too! The Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts are out in full force raising money by selling their yummy popcorn. Check out the website to find some near you! http://www.trails-end.com/.

I would like to send a special hello out to my new friend Brett from Mendon, Massachusetts. I hope you had a great visit to Maine and by the way did you see my vest along the train tracks?

Autumn Leaves

Greetings!

The autumn leaves will be at their peak this week here in the western mountains of Maine, so I hope you have made plans to pay us a visit to take in our fall colors or at least visit me.

I like the trees that look like yellow school buses this time of year, but my favorites are the red maple trees because moose look best with a red background.

I have been wondering why the leaves change color, so this year I decided to find out. Those beautiful red colors are caused by glucose in the leaves and that it is there all summer, we just can’t see it because of the green. It is amazing the things that one slightly technologically inept moose can learn online.

On another Moose tangent - Did you also know that of all the important acts our United States Congress has passed this year, the most notable was declaring National Watermelon Day (August 3rd)!

But on a serious note, what about National Moose Day? Just wanted to get your antlers tuned in for now, but more on that coming soon!

I wanted to send out a special hello to my friends who will be loitering at the Phillips Scarecrow Reunion starting on October 4th. People sure don’t need much of a reason to dress up their scarecrows in funny clothes now do they, but I have yet to see anyone dress one up like a moose. Now that would be almost as much of a spectacle as the autumn foliage!